Sunday 24 March 2013

Possibly Platonic...?

After he dropped off the planet, I decided to give Meetup guy, Adam, one last text before I wrote him off. And surprisingly, he responded back with an apology, saying he had only returned from his trip overseas visiting family and had been busy catching up on the backlog of work that had accumulated in his absence. Oops...I felt a little bad about my patience running short with him, but the lunch date we had a few weeks ago made up for it.

It was a simple enough get together, since he only works about 3 blocks away from my office. We grabbed takeout from a nearby Italian bistro and enjoyed one of the first few sunny spring days here. Even though I call it a lunch date, it wasn't a "date" in the sense it was with Alex; we each paid for our own meals and there wasn't really the tension and pressure there was meeting with Alex. It felt like I could've been meeting one of The Guys or Britney or Lindsay for lunch. In comparison to Alex, Adam isn't quite as open about his emotions as Alex (ex. Adam and I haven't talked about coming out, or his relationship with his family all that much vs. Alex), but I like that Adam is way more laid back, optimistic and carefree. We love talking movies, food, travel and hanging out with friends, and we can spend our whole lunch hour talking about that sort of stuff.

Speaking of movies, he invited me to a follow-up hang out the following Saturday to go see the  new Wizard of Oz movie. He was originally planning to go with some of his friends the week before, but since they bailed on him, his plans changed. At first, I thought his friends would show up with us since they had bailed previously, but no...it was just me and him, and since he had some leftover movie tickets, he took care of it for me. Hmmmm. Despite that, it still didn't exactly have that feel of a date; again Adam didn't really press and make a conscious effort to make small talk during coffee afterwards like Alex did in order to get to know me. It was much more casual feeling and the conversation flowed pretty naturally. Anyway, apparently I owe him a lunch now, so I'll be seeing him again soon. 

I'm still not sure exactly what you would define what's going on between us, but I'm enjoying the more relaxed interaction between Adam and I. And because of that, things feel a lot more platonic, which I'm more than happy about. I can see Adam being a better friend to me than a boyfriend. It'd be great to have a gay friend that I can gossip about guys to =P I never thought I would, but I kind of enjoy this dating/getting-to-know-new-guys thing...I'm actually getting a feel for what I like and enjoy in a boyfriend.

And speaking of Alex...he's going to be back in Vancouver next week, and he's already asked if I'm available to hang out. I'm totally down to hang out, but at the same time, I'm nervous. We've been texting back and forth pretty consistently back and forth for about a month now, and I have this sinking feeling he's ready to make a move. During the last text conversation he had, he made several blatant passes at me, which while flattering, were super awkward. I felt bad shutting him down or being wishy-washy. We also had an awkward exchange, in which he made it sound like he  I'm just having too good of a time trying to meet and hang out with these guys, and I don't think I'm ready to commit to anything just yet. But I won't get ahead of myself, lets wait till he gets here and see what happens.

Wednesday 20 March 2013

Cliff Notes

Hey! So, life's caught up with me again and I'm behind on blog posts. I've got a couple drafts on the go, but so I don't forget, here's what's been going on lately (in point form):

- Started (wall) climbing pretty seriously, which is stupid fun and a great workout. I love challenging myself to try different and harder routes each time. And LOL at people thinking Britney and I are dating...we just make a cute climbing couple =P

- Alex: is coming back to Vancouver next week, and is really enthusiastic and is conscientiously making an effort to see me. And I mean, REALLY enthusiastic...

- Meetup guy, Adam: returned my text a few weeks ago and we had a lunch date. And then a movie date. Despite me using the word date, we feel pretty friend zone-y.

- Shane: after months of prodding, hinting and awkward moments, I might actually get a chance to see him again and feel things out...Nate let me know I was invited to his birthday celebrations and he "wants me to come" apparently (and no, not in that way...I think.)

- OkCupid: I'm surprised, I've gotten quite a few messages from dudes, and sent out a handful of messages myself. Most are still in the early stages, but there's one so far that seems to warrant a date. Trying to set that up... 

- I'm starting counseling again, albeit with a new counselor: I've done a lot better in the last few months, but I still find myself being overly critical of myself and still have some anxiety issues. It must be almost a year since I've gone, so I think now is a good time to go and reevaluate and get some more guidance in light of all these changes.

- Ummmm...kinda excited the VW GTD is coming to the States (and hopefully Canada!). Love me some fun, green motoring...